For as long as I can remember I've struggled with feeling unloved. I'm sure it's not true. "Feeling" and "being" are two very different things. I just go through these times of feeling not good enough and not loved. It's a horrible feeling and can create very dark times in my life. It consumes me and almost paralyzes me.
A few years back these times rolled very quickly one right after another. It was suffocating and kept me down a lot.
Two years ago, God gave me a year where He just lavished His love on me. It just poured all over me and I finally understood His unconditional love for us. It didn't matter what I did or didn't do, He still loved me. I didn't have to work for it; I didn't have to "buy" it. He just loved me.
That same year I went through a study called "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldredge. It was amazing! It helped to bring healing to my life and finally discover my identity in Christ - a daughter of THE King.
I felt free! Free to be who God made me to be. Free from my past. Free from my mistakes. Free from my insecurities. Free from the lies the enemy has hurled at me my entire life.
The lies that I am unloved, not enough, and not beautiful were replaced with I LOVE you, you are MORE than enough, and you are BEAUTIFUL!!
I have never felt such unconditional love. The only thing I can think of that comes close is the love a baby has for his mama. My son is 10 months old and he just plain LOVES me. It doesn't matter what I look like or how trendy I am. He adores me and wants to be with me and give me his amazing (and sometimes scary - he has teeth) kisses.
I still struggle at times with feeling unloved but they are fewer and farer in between. Now I know the Truth and am equipped to recognize these attacks from the enemy. I am able to tell my feelings what my head knows. I am loved unconditionally! I am fearfully and wonderfully made! I have God-given talents and abilities! I am beautiful just the way God made me!
And here's a secret ... God is just as smitten with you!!
I am thrilled to tell you that this fall we are starting a Nurture twirl group. Twirl (http://twirlministries.blogspot.com) is a women's Bible study ministry that meets in a small group setting with the intent of making Jesus famous in the hearts of women.
Our first study will be Captivating.
"Life is harsh on the heart of a girl. And a woman. As the years pass by, the heart of a woman gets pushed aside, wounded, buried.
The story of your life is the story of the long and sustained assault on your heart by the one who knows who you could be - and fears you. But every story also has a Hero. The story of your life is also the story of the long and passionate pursuit of your heart by the God who comes both to ransom and restore you as a captivating woman."
If you are in need of an inner healing or just want to learn more about the love our Father has for us, come check out this study.
We will be meeting once a month on the 2nd Thursday at 7:00 pm at WFA in room A. Nurture twirl is open for any mom at any age. Sign up and order your book and study guide (the cost is $16 for both used during this yearlong study) today!
I'm so excited to see what God has in store for us as we dig into His word and begin a great Romance with Him.
"I am my Beloved's, and His desire is toward me." Song of Solomon 7:10
