My Life As a Mom

There will be a new series on the Nurture blog called "My Life As a Mom" that will post on the 2nd and 4th Friday of every month.

Every month 2 different moms will have the opportunity to share their "story". This is their chance to tell their story and create awareness and empathy among moms. 

As moms, we judge and are judged. I'm sure we've all done it at least once. We judge other moms' choices, behavior of their kids, and even how their kids look. What we don't always realize is what that mom's life is REALLY like. Every mom has a different story. Each of us has unique challenges we face and joys we experience. 

By telling your story, you can help other moms broaden their views and create community when another mom recognizes that some of YOUR story is also part of THEIR story. 

I'm excited and I think this will be a fun thing. You do not have to share anything that you do not feel comfortable sharing. The posts do not need to be fancy or extremely well written. Just give us a glimpse into what your life as a mom is really like. 

If you would like to tell your story, please email me at nurturewfa(at)hotmail(dot)com and I will set it up. I already have several moms that are willing to share their stories, I hope you will be, too.  If you know of anyone else with a story they would be willing to share, let me know. 

Some ideas of stories could be :

My Life As a Mom  ...
of boys; 
of girls; 
working full-time; 
working part-time; 
at home full-time; 
after infertility; 
dealing with depression; 
of a child with special needs; 

The list could truly go on and on. God has given each one of us an unique story and life. Let's celebrate that! 


********************************************


I will go first and share my story with you today ...

My Life As an Overwhelmed Mom

by Jamie

I was married at a young age - just shy of my 21st birthday.  After experiencing some female "issues," I was worried that I may struggle with infertility.  Since being a mom was really important to me, we decided we should start trying to get pregnant earlier rather than later in case it took awhile.  While it did take 6 months or so (which is totally normal the first time), I became pregnant with no problems whatsoever.  I have to laugh now - pregnant with my 5th - that infertility was ever a concern in my mind but you just never know. :)

My oldest daughter was born when I was 23.  Most of my friends were not even married at this point, let alone mothers themselves.  


I loved my daughter.  


I loved being a mom.  


But I was lonely.  


There was no one to have playdates with.  No one, besides my mom, to glean information or tips from.  I really had no idea what I was doing and it was HARD.  

I had no idea how hard motherhood was going to be.  How much it took out of you.  The fact that I really had no one to go through it with really stunk.  I avoided most of the "mom competition" that happens but I lost out on the comradery, too.

After my second daughter was born 3 years later, I started to develop some issues with anxiety.  Over time it worsened and motherhood was not the beautiful thing I thought it would be.

My story is really complex and someday I hope to share it ALL with you but in a nut shell I experienced some very hard, dark years.  I lost my identity.  I didn't know who I was other than "mom" and though I loved being a mom and my kids are the joys of my life, I don't think I was truly happy.

I was overwhelmed. Like big time. Even the simplest daily tasks were totally overwhelming to me. And dealing with people, forget about it. 

Most days I felt like I was drowning in life. Every so often, I'd come up for small gasps of air but as soon as I was up, I was pushed back down into this swirling abyss that I did not have the strength or energy to pull myself out of. So many times I thought, Why doesn't someone help me, throw me a life preserver, pull me out? Doesn't anyone see that I'm drowning? Doesn't anyone care?

I later realized that no one could help me because they didn't even know what was going on.

I know there were years where I was simply not myself. I had lost myself and for the life of me, couldn't find the real me again. I hated the person I had become but it was the only way I could deal with life.

Avoidance. The best way I could cope was simply by avoidance.

I couldn't handle the clutter in my house, I avoided it. (In which, the clutter grew.)

I couldn't deal with people, so I avoided them. (Yep, relationships suffered.)

I couldn't deal with the pregnancy pounds and clothes not fitting and I avoided taking care of myself. (it definitely took a toll on my body.)

Avoidance was the key to keeping me out of the insane asylum but it literally destroyed so many areas of my life.

I don't know why we go through the things we do but I do know that we can use those situations and what we've learned to help others. I feel compassion for people struggling with things I struggle or have struggled with. I know what it's like. I pray God is able to use me to help others like me. 

During those hard years, God placed a desire in my heart to minister to other moms.  It was strong and it was my "dream."  It was something I couldn't ever really see happening.  How could I help anyone when I couldn't help myself?  But the desire never left and only grew over time.

About a year ago, God stepped into my life in a BIG way and turned my life upside down.  He healed me from so many of the issues I had dealt with.  He provided the pathway to bring me to where I am right now.

Helping out with Nurture is not just another thing on my "to do" list.  God has given me this passion for moms that started years ago.  The fact that God feels He can use me in this way is so humbling to me and makes the desire to serve the moms of our area a privilege.  

I want to provide opportunities for moms to make connections with other moms; whether it is through playdates or Saturday morning Coffee Breaks or Little Blessings or whatever else the future holds.  I don't want any other mom to have to feel alone or like they have nowhere to go with their mommy questions, concerns, and triumphs.  

I pray that Nurture is able to support moms in all they are going through.

*If you are feeling hopeless or overwhelmed beyond belief, please feel like you can come to me and confide in me. I've been there. There are still days I feel like I'm headed back there but God is faithful and able. There probably won't be much I can do but I'll do all I can and I'll pray for you - that's everything right there. You do not have to go through this alone. You are not ever alone (God is there), but I know it feels like it sometimes.*

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." 

Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

**********************************************

Check back on June 22 for the next My Life As a Mom  story!